Sexploration with Monika
Sexploration with Monika
Deepen Your Relationship With Sex, Magic with Real-World Benefits!

Dr. Janelle Alex and Rob Alex have found that adding intention, awareness, and a belief in sacredness to their sex life has brought them not only increased intimacy and pleasure, they've experienced real-world benefits as well, opportunities and promotions that come to them like magic after they connect on the physical plane. What can you create with the powerful energy of sexuality? Healing, manifestation, or even if you just want to have fun and add a spark of adventure to your relationship, has an intimate adventure or twelve for you. Rob and Janelle will describe several Sexy Challenges that they've tried, tested and laid out for you, and they'll tell the incredible story of what real magic sex brings to their lives. Not only is sex fun, but it can transcend what most people think is even possible. Dr. Janelle Alex will also tell us about, where she help women connect with their sacred selves so that they can fuel the rest of their lives with love and vitality. Rob & Janelle not only help couples spice up their love life, they also work on compassionate communication with The Couple's Spot. They'll tell us the most simple way to diffuse an argument, that most of us habitually destroy. Do you want a more fun, successful, and special relationship? While we've discussed sacred sex ideas like tantra, orgasmic meditation, and even sacred BDSM before, this is a particularly magical and mind-blowing episode of Sexploration with Monika. You won't believe what sex, intention, and awareness can do, perhaps you should experiment with it yourself!

Direct download: Sexploration121228_SexyMagicRitual.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:40am PDT

Festive Feminists, Queers, & Goddess-Worshippers

We all have to survive the holiday season whether or not we get awarded a halo. Who sings xmas carols for the outcasts? Crackpot Crones Terry Baum and Carolyn Myers, who have done holiday sketch theater and improv for a combined 108 years. They celebrate feminism, political protest, social justice, and being different with laughter while claiming "crazy" and "crone," because surviving the perpetual witch hunt of patriarchy is nothing to hide. We'll sing along with the 12 Days of Family Insults, and certainly Moishe the Green-Nosed Herring will soon be your kids' favorite. Has anyone ever tried to get you to pretend or look different than you really are for a holiday dinner? "Bubbie and her Butch" tells the story of a lesbian couple, a Hanukkah party, and a ridiculously jangly pair of earrings. You will not believe the story the Virgin Mary (or should I say Version Mary) tells to her beloved acolyte in Russia or 1962, where Mary (and all religion) may be outlawed, but abortion is legal. Pussy Riot's "Punk Prayer" to oust Putin gets Mary's compassionate ear too. When you're in the old folks home would you plan your escape to protest unmanned warfare drones in Pakistan? "Crones for the Holidays" manages to be fun, funny, and a laser-pointer of social justice activism and actually teach you something about the "end" of the Mayan Calendar too.  

Direct download: Sexploration121221_FestivityForOutcasts.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:31am PDT

Your Daily 3-Minute Orgasm & Clit Like a Soccer Ball

How could you be so turned on and sensitive that your clitoris felt like a soccer ball? What are the effects of having a 3-minute orgasm every day? Hint: it's not losing sleep, you only have to wake 5 min earlier. How could menopause be PLEASURABLE? How can masturbation help you experience more pleasure with a partner? How can you get more experiences of sensuality simply by shifting your awareness? How can you fit a commitment to pleasure in your busy day? How would a daily commitment to pleasure expand your sense of relaxation? I'm on the 3-Day Sensuality Retreat with the sensual researchers of the Welcomed Consensus. We'll explore deliberate orgasm or "doing," a practice of focusing on the pleasurable sensations of the clit being stroked. Yvonne Wray of will tell us how she transformed her experience of menopause from fear to fun by letting go and being presence in the moment. Daisy Meyer uses the power of friendship and masturbation to transform communication in a relationship in a pleasure-oriented way. Cedric will tell us how the clitoris can feel like a soccer ball in sensation, and use awareness to feel every stitch on the head or glans of the clitoris with his fingertip. Then co-founder Francoise Devresse will tell us about the Observation of Intense Coming and invite you to try a daily 3-minute orgasm (as a founder of the Welcomed Consensus she's had an orgasm every day for 18 years) and tell us how anyone can create more pleasure in their life, in their body.

Direct download: Sexploration121213_SoccerBallClitoris.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:22am PDT

Bondage, Clowns, Gods, Piercing, & Sex-Positive Parenting

You can join us now in the leather-scented midst of the Sexploration with Monika bondage dinner at supperclub. We'll speak with educator of adventurous sexuality Midori about her history with performance art, Italian Clowns, donuts with an especially messy surprise, and the Japanese art of flower arranging plus bondage. Then Midori will introduce us to blogger and sex-positive parent Lidia Anain who'll open our eyes about parenting strategies that consider consent and autonomy. How do you parent without "making" your kid do stuff, and how does that relate to creating consent culture? Burlesque dancer Dorian Faust describes pagan god Baphomet, who represents the duality of male and female... and why this deity often ended up looking like Satan. Then erotic piercing performer Lady Samar will tell us why she likes hanging from hooks in her flesh... even on TV in Norway. Thanks to the lovely Julia O Test for the photos from the bondage dinner! 

Direct download: Sexploration1211115_BondageClownsGodsPiercing.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:15am PDT

A Trannyshack Xmas for Everyone w/ The Golden Girls

If you are gay, transgender, kinky, or any kind of black sheep sometimes there are Christmases that you make your own "intentional family" out of friends, roommates, and people that accept you the way you are. Heklina started the legendary drag show Trannyshack in San Francisco and for Christmas she's been taking Golden Girls episodes to the stage, the "girls" played by Drag Queens (men dressed like women) for some gender-bending, heart-warming, campy hilarity. What does family mean when you take the being-related part away? What's it like to be a drag queen? How do these ginormous guys become women? What's the most important part of your grooming arsenal as a drag performer? What if a person that was born a woman wants to be drag queen? Trannyshack's The Golden Girls: The Christmas Episodes 2012 is playing December 6th to the 30th at the Victoria Theater at Mission and 16th Streets. If your family thinks you're a freak, with whom do you spend your Christmas (and isn't it maybe better anyway to spend Xmas with people who love and accept you unconditionally)? 

Direct download: Sexploration121130_TrannyshackXmasGoldenGrrls.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:14am PDT

Masquerotica: The Yes Yes Yes Party

You can join us right now at the big sexY costume party Masquerotica where thousands of people are saying yes to what they think is fun, and consent is the new sexy (not that consent ever goes out of style;). We'll interview SF's sex-positive glitterati, a latex snow leopard, vampire food, and erotic electrifier, the leader of the apocalypse army, and a very kinky clown about how knowing that you can say no, makes it save for you to say yes, to all sorts of experiences and pleasures and sexy moments that we'd like to share with you live, on-location from Masquerotica 2012. From Barron Scott Levkoff to Kracker the Klown, and plenty of sights, sounds, and sensations in between we'll talk about consent and exploration up one side and down the other all over this party. Plus we'll learn how electricity on skin can actually relax and excite some people so much that they have 4 orgasms (with their clothes on & not even touching any "naughty" bits!) Violet Wand virtuoso William from Bondage-A-Go-Go will reveal some of his electricity play techniques and unexpected "special spots." How can you start a Kinky Salon in your hometown? There's a KinkyWiki for you DIY community creators and creatrixes!

Direct download: Sexploration121020_YesYesYesParty.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:49pm PDT

Masquerotica: End the Battle of the Sexes

You can hunt sexperts with me at Masquerotica! At's SF's biggest sexY party, we'll learn the secrets of animal play, why this beautiful woman likes pain, and mmmoore, but first, as a little tease (the rest of the interviews are yet to come) join me and Sacred Courtesan School and Knights of Eros founder Francesca Gentille for a surprisingly simple way to end the battle of the sexes. Have you experienced the cold shoulder or an overly pushy person? We'll talk about how you can find common ground, how to drop in to the present with a stranger, how our most common wounds create an extended drama between the sexes, and how to connect past them. Also, how you can create juicy energy and attract people to you! Where does juicy energy come from? 

Direct download: Sexploration121021_EndBattleOfSexesMasQ.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:10pm PDT

Conscious Sensuality & Using Sensation to Increase Awareness

You can join tantric masseuse and sensuality coach Robert Silber and I in bed for a discussion about how focusing on sensation can increase your awareness, and how being in touch with your emotions can help you connect with your sexuality and sensuality. We'll discuss the neurological circuitry that hooks up your autonomic nervous system (in charge of sex and keeping you alive) via your emotions to your thoughts and experiences, and how integrating your experiences through acknowledging them via breath sound and movement can really help you both master and free all of your expression both in bed and out. If you were wondering, Robert and I are at sex educator Reid Mihalko and Allison Moon's sex geek brunch, so we hid away in Allison & Reid's bed to bring you the scoop on sensations, emotions, and letting your cat out of the bag. We also connect his work to Orgasmic Meditation and multiple orgasms for men, which we've discussed in earlier episodes of Sexploration with Monika.

Direct download: Sexploration121028_ConsciousSensuality.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:16am PDT

Sex and Musicals: Are you a GirlFag?

You can join author Janet Hardy and I at the Wicked Grounds kinky coffeeshop for a discussion of sex, musicals, gender, being highly sexual, being in love with gay men, unfolding the mysteries of hanky code, fluidity, beyond binaries, and consent at a book reading of her new book, "GirlFag: a Life told in Sex and Musicals." Janet Hardy co-wrote the Ethical Slut, The Topping Book, The Bottoming Book, and many other sex-positive classics with Dossie Easton. Janet's latest book details her life as a girlfag, visits girlfags past and present like the girlfag pharaoh of Egypt and a British expat writer in South Africa. Girlfag, while gleefully recalling musical theatre numbers, also sifts through the shifting meanings of gender and sexual orientation. Monika wonders if she too is not just a "fruit fly," but also a girlfag. Janet has also started a new book publishing house, Beyond Binary, and we discuss how fun it is to slide between things both literally and figuratively.

Direct download: Sexploration121020_SexAndMusicals.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:44pm PDT

Kinky Salon's Pussyfest, SF's Friskiest Sexy Party

You can slink into Kinky Salon's Pussyfest, San Francisco's friskiest sex party. We'll talk about how social networking is leading to more authenticity and sex-positivity with Eamon Armstrong the Minister of Purpleganda for Masquerotica, plus Wicked Grounds SF's kinky coffeeshop co-owner PsychoKitty dishes about his favorite tricks with dog bowls and miles of hemp rope, then the deliciously feathery Belle Phénomène tells us how she went from a life of abuse and slut-shaming to being proud of being authentically her own beautiful freak through burlesque! Thanks to Richard Wang Photography for the photo of Belle! Meow. 

Direct download: Sexploration120915_PussyfestKinkySalon.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:42am PDT

Live from Folsom & Mmmore Sexy Parties

You can join us right now on location at the Folsom Street Fair, where hundreds of thousands of sexy fetish, latex, & leather-clad party-goers pack themselves onto Folsom street in San Francisco's SoMa District. Scott Levkoff, co-founder of the Kinky Salon sex party, is at the Masquerotica booth primping the tentacled post-apocalyptic angels of sexy-wierditude, corseted, headressed, and protuberantly costumed himself (Thanks to RCW Photography for the photo of Scott!). Also, we track down Bent who started a Kinky Salon in Copenhagen, Denmark What's it like starting your own Kinky Salon? How do you create a party that is sexy, relaxed, and friendly? How does the very San Francisco Kinky Salon translate to other cultures?

Direct download: Sexploration120923_SexyStreetFair.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:04pm PDT

Healing Power of Strip Tease, All Kinds of Sexy

Can strip tease be healing? You can join me at a burlesque scholarship benefit for victims of rape, sexual abuse, domestic violence, and eating disorders - can learning sexy dance moves (and how to take it off in a way that is scintillating rather than awkward) actually be a part of a healing and empowerment process? How can learning burlesque shimmies (and that awesome twirling pasties helicopter thing) help you reclaim your body (as it is in the moment) and your sense of "sexy-self-hood?" We'll talk to a woman who said it's changed her life - not just now there's glitter all over everything. Dance instructor Bombshell Betty's empowerment-plus-shimmy scholarship program transformed scholarship recipient and survivor Vahalla Voom's life from not-that-glittery to healed joyful self-confidence body-positivity with extra fringe, tiger stripes, bonus openness, and new friends. MC Odessa Lil agrees taking your clothes off on stage is an act of agency and protest in a sex-negative world. We are only bummed that we missed Lynn Ruth Miller, the Stripping Granny at "All Kinds of Sexy." :( Thanks to Alex Akamine for the lovely photo of Tanqueray Von Grafenburg!

Direct download: Sexploration120911_AllKindsofSexy.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:28pm PDT

Slut Walk: Power, Sex, & Consent Culture

You've probably heard, "what was she wearing?" or "why was she in his bedroom?" as someone talks about rape. Why do we blame the victim instead of the rapist? Even a police officer during a safety class in Toronto said, to remain safe "women should avoid dressing like sluts." Thousands of people protested in front of the Toronto police department, and the SlutWalk movement began. SlutWalk marches have spread throughout the US, Berlin, India, Morocco, Singapore and all over the globe. Join us as we celebrate slut-positivity and consent culture at San Francisco's Slut Walk 2012. We'll talk to Tommi Avicolli Mecca about Stonewall, the Gay Liberation Front in the 70's & connections between transgender violence and slut-shaming. We'll also talk about protecting sex-workers from rape and a new law claiming to protect victims of human sex trafficking. Maxine Doogan, founder of the Erotic Service Provider Legal Educational and Research Project has shocking finding about the horrible fine print in this law, abuse by police and explains how Prop 35 makes sex workers even more vulnerable. You don't have to be a slut to benefit from living in a slut-positive world. Jadelynn Stahl, one of the organizers of SlutWalk SF Bay, deconstructs how social power and sexual power are affected by victim-blaming, slut-shaming, and infantilizing the rapist. How we can speak out & claim our right to safety no matter where we are, what we're doing, or what clothes we're wearing - if we're sluts and even if we're not sluts!?

Direct download: Sexploration090812_SlutWalk.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:31pm PDT

Cum, Glitter, Race Politics, & Consent Culture

You can't get a ticket to this Saturday's performance of Cum and Glitter, a secret live sex-show for and by sex workers (because it's sold out), but you can join us now at their (un)dress rehearsal! We'll talk with Dorian Faust, queen of indie burlesque, about her & Eve's "fall from grace" - a burlesque-ter-bation! Also race politics in taking off your clothes professionally. Then we'll talk to Kitty Stryker, sex-worker and "Purrversitility" blogger, about her military spanky-the-klown (or spanking the clown scene) scene, creating consent culture, and working as a "fat" sex worker. Kitty and her sex-positive colleagues Kelly Shibari, and Jolene Parton did a presentation on the challenges of being - or being perceived as "fat" for the kind of sex work you are doing... there are positive, healing things about "fat sex work" Kitty adds, as well. How can you contribute to consent culture? Very literally, in fact. You can also watch Saturday's sold-out Cum & Glitter shows live streaming from the comfort of your own laptop on Skin Video, or watch previous shows now on Indie Porn Revolution. Thanks to Tristan Crane for taking this photo!

Direct download: Sexploration120917_CumNGlitterConsentCulture.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:48am PDT

Guide to Sex Parties: Freedom & Safety vs. Creepy

You probably did not learn about how sex parties work in sex ed class. Are sex-parties a total free-for-all? What are "the rules?" How in a sea of sexy writhing bodies on a dance floor of 20 or 200 are you supposed to behave if a complete stranger is shaking their lightly-clad groove thing within reach? What exactly constitutes "an invitation?" How to make sure everyone feels safe enough to be sexually free? How do you deal with (or prevent) the creep factor? We'll talk with Barron Scott Levkoff, co-founder of Kinky Salon about all that is going into making a sexy party safe for thousands of people for Friday, October 20th's Masquerotica in San Francisco. Then we'll discuss Pepper Mint's Guide to Sex Parties before the Folsom Leather & BDSM street fair after-party at Mission Control, "Threshold," on Sunday, September 23rd, 2012.

Direct download: Sexploration120914_SexyPartyGuide.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:05pm PDT

How to Drive a Vulva & Shutting Down Legitimized Rape Culture

How can you take all the increased awareness of rape and the critical need to become a culture of consent generated by Republican Todd Akin's quote, "If it's legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down" and use the momentum to create healthier relationships and better sex? Akin's statement is not only false and offensively dangerous, but Akin's brand of political idiocy affects all women and the whole culture. Sex-educators Reid Mihalko of, and Allison Moon of Lesbian and I are literally in bed talking about the commitment to consent and "How to be a Gentlemen and Get Laid," this is actually a class Reid teaches! If rape and the fear of rape makes women shut down their sexuality, how can we create safety and freedom? We'll also learn about how to drive a vulva, the unexplored and genderless joy of taints, and whether a balloon orgy pops with a glory hole. We'll take a Sexploration with Monika listener question about when one partner wants to explore something freaky and the other one is a big NO - which is hard, because even after you try to find out about WHY your partner is shut down, you both have to accept the other as is, because from celibate to freaky-deaky every person has a right to their sexuality - but how to make the unmatched sex drives work together? Sexual freedom isn't "easy!" Photo of Reid & Allison by Shilo McCabe of the Sex Positive Photo Project. Also, you can join Alison Moon and I at Fleur de Lis SF's Sexy Circus Friday, September 21st at supperclub. So sexy you can't buy tickets at the door!! 

Direct download: Sexploration120822_ConsentSexy.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:09pm PDT

Sex at Burning Man, DIY Goddess Temples, & Brothels Serving Women

This is your relationship on Burning Man: You've barely slept or eaten in 6 days and dehydrated not just because this is the desert but also the water in your camelback tastes like warm plastic dust. You were distracted by a glimpse of your old boss on a bike wearing nothing but a backpack and sneakers, so a luminescent green dragon just drove away with your sweetie and 17 gorgeous half-naked strangers. Do you have a "just in case we get lost" plan with your partner? What if the temple is going to burn in 10 minutes and one of you isn't ready? You're probably not going to "just find each other" out there and there are no cell phones or street signs. It's 50,000 people in the pitch black night. Nothing goes as planned on the playa especially sex and relationships. Burning Man isn't "one giant orgy," but there are a few(!) - plus workshops on female ejaculation, bondage, polyamory, "hands on" sex classes, and even the "Great Canadian Beaver-Eating Contest" in which everything is consensual and no beavers are harmed. Join Sexploration with Monika in the moonlight at Fugue, a camp-out in Northern California as we talk with Epiphany Jordan about sex at Burning Man, building a temple to the goddess in Texas (The Blue Star Temple), the benefits of tantra, what a brothel for women might look like, and how to build sexual energy into your real estate.

Direct download: Sexploration120806_SexAtBurningMan.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:11pm PDT

Multiple Orgasms for Men and Full-Body Energy Orgasm

Did you know that men can have multiple orgasms? Dr. James Rolwing, chiropractor and author of “Multiple Orgasms for Men Made Simple” says that not only can any man have multiple, full-body energetic orgasms but that the idea that your sexual energy has to diminish with age is total bunk. With non-ejaculative energy orgasms, you can experience not only greater control and relaxation during sex, but also your relationship to pleasure and arousal builds and deepens with practice. You don't have to hold it, think about baseball, disconnect from how good it feels, just desperately hoping that you don't ejaculate, because you can have a different kind of orgasm entirely. We'll discuss energetic full-body orgasms, what they feel like, how to have them, and why the vast majority of us have no clue about them. We'll also discuss how the power of sexuality, and the power of multiple orgasms has been used to consolidate power for a minority of people throughout history. Also, we'll discuss why even if you're having a non-ejaculative orgasm, you're still at risk for pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections, so you should still use a condom. And it might even help. But, once you have mastered multiple full-body non-ejaculative orgasms, can you still ejaculate if you feel like it? Let's find out.

Direct download: Sexploration120810_MultipleOs4Men.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:53pm PDT

The Complex Economies of Art, Sex, & Desire

If you could have anything, what would you choose? If you had 20 minutes with a sex worker what would you want? If you had 15 minutes on stage what would you say? If you had 20 minutes with a healer what would you want? If a starving artist isn't making money, what do they get out of making art? What does a sex-worker get out of sex-work besides money? What skills are in a sex-workers' body of knowledge? What work does a sex-worker share with the world? What are the economies of art, sexuality, and desire? In addition to money and capitalism, what are some of the other economies that we use? Especially in marginalized communities, sex-workers, activists, healers, artists... there are community networks of barter, trade, trust and collaboration. How can asking for what we want change the world? We'll discus the "This is What I Want" Festival with Tessa Wills, artistic director and activist for sex-worker advocacy. We'll discuss performance art, and the intersections of the starving artist and the underground economy of erotic service providers. 

Direct download: Sexploration120802_EconomyOfDesire.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:38am PDT

Occupy Your Body, Ending Jealousy, & other <3 revolutions

How much of your time are you "in" your body, and how often are you in your head? You've heard of "Occupy Wall Street," but what about Occupy Your Body? In our virtual, abstract, and mentally productive lives, it’s easy to live mostly experiencing life as your mind, rather than experiencing from your body. We more often think about what our bodies look like than what they feel like, experiencing our bodies as a separate object from ourselves!!!  In addition to diminishing sensation and pleasure, our separation from our bodies affects our self-image, our sexuality, our relationships, our sense of aliveness, and can eventually harm health and well-being. Steve Bearman, founder of the Interchange Counseling Institute, also tells us about how being present in the moment can help us connect with other people and transform our relationships, revolutionizing jealousy, arguments, and break-ups. We'll talk about his classes "Healing Body Shame," "Ending Jealousy Permanently," "How to LOSE an Argument," and "The Power of Goodbye." How can you Occupy Your Body more deeply and frequently and how will that ignite your sexuality? What does your body truly find *pleasurable!?*

Direct download: Sexploration120712_OccupyYourBody.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:54pm PDT

Marquis de Sade: Revolution & Theatre of the Insane

Not only were sadism and sadistic sadists named after him, the Marquis de Sade was a writer!  In addition to the 90-feet of fiction he wrote on toilet paper in prison... the Marquis de Sade wrote theatre in his insane asylum w/ his fellow inmates playing the parts! Now at the Brava Theatre in San Francisco, Marat/Sade plays the fury, passion, and philosophy of the Marquis de Sade off of doomed dictator of the French revolution Jean-Paul Marat. Marat's fate awaits: counter-revolutionary Charlotte Corday will stab him in his bathtub 13 July, 1793.  However, the Marquis and Marat are both so tortured, and Charlotte was headed for the guillotine even before the stabbing... who will "win" the revolution? You'll hear Marat talk about the bankers, politicians, war-mongers, and stockbrokers that betray the people - does it remind you of any bubble bursting? Today's 99% and the occupy wall street movement are bringing up the same issues today! We'll interview cast members Bonni Suval and Tom Orr, and the producer of Marat/Sade, Marc Huestis. You can get tickets at, shows are Wednesday through Sunday until July 29th. It's hard to say who really wins a revolution... unless we're talking about the pleasurevolution where everyone wins! We'll talk more about desire, consent, and social justice on the next episode on Sexploration with Monika - where we pretend to be only talking about sex - but actually we're cheerleaders for the pleasurevolution! Don't miss an episode by subscribing on iTunes, archived episodes, free downloads, and photos at

Direct download: Sexploration120713_RevolutionDeSade.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:52am PDT

Desire & Getting the Kinks Out with Mistress Minax

What do you really want? If someone gave you the opportunity to really ask for your erotic or experiential desires, what would you ask for? What kind of touch, healing, sensation or stimulation? Of course, even though you paid a small fee for your ticket, you only get 20 minutes, but what's on the menu may surprise you with it's complexity, breadth, and depth. The artists are real erotic service providers and your wishes will be taken completely seriously.  The "This is What I Want Festival" at the Center for Sex and Culture is an experiential performance art piece conceptualizing the economy of desire. We'll discuss desire, desires, and more with professional dominatrix and sex educator Eve Minax, who was one of the artists at the event. We'll find out what she offered, and what audience members experienced. We'll also discuss how trauma can affect your sex life, and how to heal. You'll learn what Trauma Release Exercises from Dr. David Berceli have to do with your thrusting and flight-or-flight muscle. Eve and I are in the dungeonette, and we also discuss the 3-day Dominance Intensive for which she is currently packing her paddles, whips, and shiny boots. Her other classes, like "You're Going to Need an Enema for That" are nearly literally a three-ring circus of surprises! Photo by Stephen Dorian Minor. We'll also learn how she "gets the kinks out" of her ever-so-willing "patients" in medical play scene. Is there a connection between the spiritual side of sexuality and BDSM, what's tantra got to do with kinky sex? Can you can teach someone how to kiss?

Direct download: Sexploration120713_GettingDesireOut.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:26am PDT

Sex-positive Parent, Race, History of Burlesque, & is that an Insult or Offer? (Sexy Circus Photo Shoot)

How does your identity affect your sexuality? Does it affect your ability to be open or your access to health care? How does race and class affect being gay, kinky, or polyamorous? We're at a photo shoot for Fleur De Lis SF's Sexy Circus (which will be @supperclub 9/20/12), sparkly clothes and ses-positive philosophies are flying. We talk to the sex-positive parent Airial Clark who just got her Master's in Human Sexuality writing about sexuality and intersecting identities. As a parent, you want your kids to be safe, have the right amount of information (not too much or too little), and not be ashamed of their bodies: how to be a sex-positive parent! What is age-appropriate sex-education? Do you ever have to pretend not to have a sex life when you are a mom or dad? What does this have to do with what you are ashamed of? Plus, a revival of classic sexitude: dancer Vagina Jenkins spills about an extra-special tent at the old-timey circus. What does this have to do with poles, snorting, and the herstory of burlesque? Everything; "hootchie"... and "cootchie" too! How is taking your clothes off a salute to working class women of the past? Finally, is "Suck my ___" an insult or an invitation? We ask MC Crumbsnatcher, "Can sex in a bathroom be special?" Why do people hook up in bathrooms in the first place and how to make it safer? Photo by Shilo McCabe of the Sex Positive Photo Project.

Direct download: Sexploration120617_SexyCircusShoot.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:31am PDT

Boobies Everywhere Need Your HELP!!!

Bouncy, pleasure-producing, and mesmerizing, everyone agrees that boobies are awesome... but you'll be surprised how sensitive breasts are not just sexually, but to our environment!  Breasts are getting bigger, arriving earlier and sucking up mysterious chemicals like estrogenic compounds and pesticides. What makes breasts so sensitive to toxins? In "Breasts: a Natural and Unnatural History" Florence Williams sets out to completely uncover boobs with the latest science in anthropology, biology, and medicine. She follows the breast through history from puberty to pregnancy to menopause, from eye-tracking studies (how many nanoseconds does it take for a guys to check out boobs?), a plastic surgeon’s office in Texas - all the way to a chemistry lab where she discovers the presence of environmental toxins in her own breast milk. Baby's first dose of JET FUEL? No wonder breast cancer hits one in eight women - but even men can get breast cancer, like a group of over 70 men who lived at the highly contaminated Camp Lejeune. We'll discuss the threats to boobies worldwide and how you can help save them. Florence describes her experience trying to avoid the toxins that end up in breast tissue, and get off-loaded to our children. How do you avoid touching plastic, or eating food that has never touched plastic? If you can't avoid these chemicals, how do we need to deal with the problem? Products with fragrances, plastics, BPA, pthalates, even store and ATM receipts, the chemicals that end up in our boobs are everywhere!

Direct download: Sexploration120607_Breasts.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:42pm PDT

You can have a THREE HOUR orgasm?

What's "the point" of having sex? Is the reason we have sex to achieve the climax of orgasm or is it to have the whole experience of pleasure and connection that you and your partner share? Sheri, of the Welcomed Consensus, tells us that if you can relax into the sensations without getting fixated on a goal, you can feel even more pleasure. In fact, every day for the last 25 years this educator and mother has made time with her partner for a practice that is all about pleasure. It's called "Deliberate Orgasm" or "DO'ing," and it's a practice that focuses attention on the sensations of the clitoris. Sheri says that you can start with even 3 minutes of this practice and start building more pleasure, actually changing your nervous system and allowing you to feel more pleasure, expanding your ability to feel the enegy in your own body. Both men and women can experience Deliberate Orgasm as givers or receivers, and Sheri said that the possibilities are unlimited, even a THREE HOUR ORGASM! We also talk about how the practice of DO'ing cultivates a deep sense of gratification that overflows into every part of her life, work, family, and all her relationships. (Imagine how much easier it is to be nice to everyone after you've had a 3-hour orgasm!!!)

Direct download: Sexploration120610_3HourOrgasm.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:58pm PDT

Live at the Masturbate-a-Thon 2012

The Masturbate-A-Thon is a charity event, like a walk-a-thon, that raises money and awareness except at the end your feet don't hurt... unless you have a really unique way of self-pleasuring! Every year at the Center for Sex and Culture, men and women get pledges or self-pledge and masturbate in public or in private to raise money for the Center For Sex and Culture, a non-profit adult sexuality education center in San Francisco. Porn star Sonny Nash goes hard for duration, trying to beat(off) last year's record of 9 hours and 59 minutes. You'll learn the critical importance of masturbation, how it literally got a bad name, and why sex-positive activists are trying to bring masturbation out of the closet. We'll interview sexologist Dr. Carol Queen co-founder of the Center for Sex and Culture, Sister Taint A Virgin of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, Library Vixen, Fleur De Lis SF's sluttiest Blogger, and dominatrix Lady Ripplee Severin. Also I get a bit of a surprise - on my pants, woopsie, how did that happen? The Center for Sex and Culture's 12th annual Masturbate-A-Thon. 

Direct download: Sexploration120527_MasturbateAThon2012.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:03pm PDT

How is the idea that sex is an "addiction" hurting us?

Do you think that you could be addicted to sex or do you know someone you think is a "sex addict?" Has anyone ever said you were a sex addict? What does it mean if sex is an addiction? What does "addiction" mean? Is sex an addiction? David Ley, PhD is a clinical psychologist practicing in New Mexico. He first began treating perpetrators and victims of sexual abuse, but expanded his practice to include the promotion of healthy sexuality and awareness of the wide range of normative sexual behaviors. Dr. Ley discusses the root causes of addiction, brain chemistry, and pleasure chemicals like dopamine and oxytocin. How does sex affect the brain vs a drug or alcohol's effect? What are the real dangers of the diagnosis of "sex addiction" to free will, your relationship, and to society? What if sex-offenders & rapists get sentenced to sex-addiction treatment facilities rather than prison? What happens when sex is viewed as a disease and too much is believed to be dangerous? How is sex-addiction dangerous? It's a discussion critical to the sexual issues facing our society and it's not what most people think. Also, it has far-reaching consequences for people who like sex more than the average person and who practice kinds of sex that are not deemed "normal" by society. 

Direct download: Sexploration120318_SexAddiction.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:14am PDT

Live w/ Midori @ 8-Course Gourmet Erotic Dinner

How can you almost psychically tease the deepest, most delicious fantasy out of your partner's mind? Almost an hour of sex-intellectual on-location interviews from the 8-course gourmet dinner with the best female bondage rigger in the whole world, Midori, sex educator, and artist. We'll also speak with Fleur de Lis SF, San Francisco's Sluttiest Blogger aka Vanessa Pinto, and Ultra Violet - and more bay-area sex positive glitterati. We'll talk about everything from how to be more sexually empowered, feminine dominance, authenticity, to why the caviar service here isn't just scandalously culinarily incorrect but also (oh) so mind-blowingly lip-smacking good to making everyday household objects into sex toys for BDSM fantasies - which ones are safe for sex play and which ones aren't! More on the connection between food and sex, how you can take caviar or any kind of cuisine to the next level (recipes for pleasure)... how to avoid the thorny bits of sexual freedom and enjoy the good stuff, and the mysterious but magically effective making-out-with-other-people boomerang effect. If you're craving an evening like this where desire is celebrated, you'll need to request a personal invitation via e-mail sexplorationwithmonika(at) You can get a $50 discount on Midori's ForteFemme Women's Dominance Weekend Intensive with discount code "monika" in San Francisco July 20th to July 23rd, 2012 and New York Nov 2-4, 2012. Mmmmmmpower(ment), yum. 

Direct download: Sexploration120421_8CourseGourmetLive.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:10pm PDT

Food & Sex: Tease @ 8-Course Gourmet Erotic Dinner

If awareness, mental focus, or consciousness makes food taste better, what does it do to your sex life? Ken is the Soux Chef at the 8-Course Gourmet Dinner. He's also a martial artist and practices meditation. One of the kinds of meditation he practices is called "stroking" and is associated with the practives of "Deliberate Orgasm," Orgasmic Meditation," or "Full-Body Expanded Orgasm." We'll discuss how presence in the moment is connected to sex and eroticism and how it can make you more responsive, more connected to your emotions, and able to generate more pleasure. Ken will reveal an exciting secret he discovered about vulnerability being quite the opposite of weakness! Plus, how did this new sense of vulnerability strengthen his martial arts practice? We'll discuss other interesting effects of 11-hours of silent meditation and the daily practice of the "stroking" meditation affected more than just his mind - or his sex life. If you are craving an evening where desire is celebrated, request an invitation via e-mail at sexplorationwithmonika(at), and more interviews from the 8-course gourmet dinner still to come with Midori, San Francisco' Sluttiest Blogger Fleur de Lis, Ultra Violet, and more of SF's sex-positive glitterati about everything from teasing a fantasy out of your partner's mind, to "pervertable" household items that can be sex toys, to sexual emowerment, and which aphrodesiac is very nutritious, making an excellent salad!

Direct download: Sexploration120421_EroticDinnerLiveTease.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:37pm PDT

Strip Clubs & Cupcakes for Social Justice

You can join the 3 sex-positeers on a cupcake-delivering mission to strip clubs for social justice with Laura Lasky of & Fleur De Lis SF's Sluttiest Blogger. You'll learn how something as sweet but insubstantial as a cupcake can help empower women and men in the adult entertainment industries. We're visiting strip clubs in North Beach, and discuss why/how it's important to show up and be there to help people. As a ex-pastor's wife and ex-sex-worker, Laura Lasky says that sex work is different in what it does for you and to you than any other profession. SolaceSF offers medical exams, counseling services, career counseling, and help with adult education, personal development, or recovery programs as needed. How can a person have a relationship with spirituality as a sex-worker, especialy as traditional interpretations of Christianity disparage sex-work? We also discuss other sex-workeroutreach projects like SWOP and how important it is to have a community, especially if you are in a profession as stigmatized, complex, and potentially dangerous (and rewarding) as all the different kinds of sex work can be.

Direct download: Sexploration120425_Cupcakes4Justice.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:32pm PDT

The Technology of Orgasm and Sex Doctors at the Antique Vibe Museum

Do you know that doctors used to call the female orgasm "hysterical paroxysm?" Join us at the grand opening of the Antique Vibrator Museum. We'll discuss why learning about the history of vibrators is a women's liberation issue that is getting even more relevant right NOW - with Emiko Omori & Wendy Slick, the filmmakers of Passion and Power: The Technology of Orgasm. Their documentary is an investigation into the Victorian mystery that "oh women don't like pleasure and don't have orgasm" but somehow these vibrating massagers have "amazing healing properties!!" Vibrators were a kind of snake oil that Victorian doctors used to medicalize pleasure and sell our orgasms back to us to as treatment for "hysteria."We'll also speak with two highly progressive doctors of human sexuality, Dr. Carol Queen of the Center for Sex and Culture and Dr. Charlie Glickman about the importance and history of pleasure and sex. Not only will you be surprised that a few men were also treated for hysteria, but how they "treated" it!

Direct download: Sexploration120502_AntiqueVibeTechDrs.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:06pm PDT

Lesbian trapped in a man's body, importance of queer porn, and public bathroom peril

Our docent is Dr. Carol Queen and yes she is wearing red fishnet stockings because THIS is the Grand Opening of the Antique Vibrator Museum! We speak with two fabulous and very different transgender sex-positive stars; transgender comedianne Morgan of "Girl Junk" and queer porn star Jiz Lee. Morgan is embarking on her "Girl Junk" tour and documentary - and she needs your help! Even if you only donate $5 to her documentary, you'll be supporting transgender voices and sending a message that it is important that you are allowed to be yourself! You'll also get to see the finished film for free. There's only a few more days in her campaign to raise money for the "Girl Junk" documentary, don't put it off. Morgan and I talk about being a lesbian trapped in a man's body, being very "manly" externally - an iron worker with secretly shaved legs and toenail polish, a life-threatening galvanizing moment that changed her life, and authenticity as essential - even when it's hard. Queer porn star Jiz Lee and I will talk about the difference between mainstreem porn and queer porn and why it's important, making sexy art for good causes, and the perils of public bathrooms for transgender people. More sex-intellectual interviews still to come from the Antique Vibrator Museum, Dr. Carol Queen, the filmakers of "Passion & Power: the Technology of Orgasm," and Dr. Charlie Glickman.

Direct download: Sexploration120412_AntiqueVibeGenderQueer.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:12am PDT

Sex-worker's Union, decriminalization, and the Hooker's Ball (from the Antique Vibe Museum)

With Dr. Carol Queen as our darling docent of the vibe, you can join us at the grand opening of the Antique Vibrator Museum at the Good Vibrations Store on Polk street here in San Francisco. In this "tease" episode, we speak with Maxine Doogan founder of the Erotic Services Provider's Union about sex-worker rights, decriminalization, stigma and how under criminalization festers violence against sex-workers, even by police. We also discuss the surprising things that are illegal (even if you're not a prostitute) and the important services that erotic service providers offer that are a benefit to society. The Hooker's Ball is the upcoming benefit for the Erotic Service Provider's Union, Saturday April 14th, at . We'll have more subversive, sex-intellectual, surprising interviews from the Antique Vibrator Museum: Dr. Carol Queen, queer porn star Jizz Lee, the filmakers of "Passion & Power: the Technology of Orgasm," Dr. Charlie Glickman, and transgender comedianne Morgan of "Girl Junk." You can subscribe to Sexploration with Monika on iTunes to have new episodes delivered automatically!

Direct download: Sexploration120412_AntiqueVibeTease.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:21pm PDT

Theatre of the RiDICKulous: Hot Greeks screwing w/ gender since 1972

The history of the college movie musical, ancient greece, and the psychedelic drag queen troupe the Cockettes smash together for a grinding rolicking and glittering evening of musical theatre in the Thrillpeddlers production of Hot Greeks at San Francisco's Hypnodrome. There is no shortage of innuendo at Athens U, as Lysistrata and her sorority sisters engage in a singing and dancing battle of the sexes where gender is just another part of the magic. We speak with Thrillpeddlers' Russell Blackwood, original Cockette & composer Scrumbly Koldewyn, and cross-dressing cast member Joshua Devore. The singing, dancing Hot, Hot Greeks and their turgid talent will thrill you in the most sex-positive way - with extra sparkle. The Hot Greeks was originally done in 1972 by the underground gender-bending sensation "The Cockettes" at the Palace Theatre in SF's North Beach, as part of the "Nocturnal Dream Show." Their dancing, set designs, show-tunes and costumes, are said to be "LSD-influenced," and other show titles include Tinsel Tarts In A Hot Coma, Journey to the Center of Uranus, and Pearls Over Shanghai (Pearls over Shanghai was also recently reproduced by the Thrillpeddlers). Listen to an original member of the Cockettes talk about what inspired the show and the new production of Hot Greeks.

Direct download: Sexploration120405_HotGreeks.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:03pm PDT

Spring Break & Date Rape: causes and myths

Spring Break is a time where alcohol and crossed sexual expectations collide, a tragic recipe for date rape. You will be shocked when you hear how many young men don't even realize that they've committed date rape, and just call it "drunk sex." Author and youth advocate Shelley Stoehr has gathered stories from many victims and near-victims of date rape and hopes that her book "Somebody's Daughter" will inspire parents and young people to have frank conversations about dating, parties, sex, drinking, and how to trust your intuition. We discuss the myths about sex and gender that perpetuate the sexual minefield and rape culture. One in five young women in college are raped, and only 1% of men who are raped report it. In fact, do we even know how many men, like rapper Lil' Wayne have lost their virginity in a situation where they maybe they don't call it rape, and try to joke about it, but they didn't really want to and were forced into it? What makes media personalities like Jimmy Kimmel minimize and joke about non-consensual sex with an 11-year old? (watch the video) What horrible lessons about sexuality and trusting the opposite sex or future romantic partners does this leave with victims? How can we prevent rape before it happens? April is National Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month, find out more about prevention, activism, and how to heal at

Direct download: Sexploration120409_DateRapeCausesMyths.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:16am PDT

Ecstasy is Necessary, Brain- and Full-Body Orgasms
You can join me for conversations about open relationships, very edgy fantasy play, the cutting edge of sex-ed, and brain-gasms at a sex-positive book signing at Good Vibrations, San Francisco's friendliest sex toy store. Barbara Carrellas is celebrating the release of her new book "Ecstasy is Necessary" and several other local sexperts are there to share thier recent exploits as well. We speak with Marcia Baczynski about her 6-month class for couples experimenting with different styles of trying non-monogamy. Ever felt jealous? You'll be surprised to learn that jealousy is less an emotion and more a veneer for many other feelings! Professional dominatrix and sex educator Eve Minax tells us how to navigate another minefield, acting out a consensual rape fantasy. How to do it so that you're sure that everyone feels good at the end? Fleur De Lis, San Francisco's sluttiest blogger, aka Vanessa Pinto tells us of her adventures aboard the Queen Mary with Nina Hartley and the places where sex educators go to bask in the glow of Joycelyn Elders. Finally we catch up with Barbara Carrellas who tells us about why ECSTASY (not just pleasure) is necessary, how to have an orgasm just by breathing even in an MRI tube (even if you're claustrophobic), and how tantra is for everyone, even house-wives in Iowa, even you... even when you are just washing the dishes or taking out the trash.
Direct download: Sexploration120321_EcstasyIsNecessary.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:26am PDT

What erotic dancers get out of their work (besides money)
Are you sex-positive? Do you believe that sex can have a positive impact on our lives? Do you believe that pleasure is important, even or especially when it challenges traditional ideas about what and who we are "supposed to be?" Many people judge sexually open people, especially women, for being generous with their sexual energy - whether it's how they dress or how they walk! Technically erotic dancing isn't actually sex (and that big bouncer is there to keep it that way), but in this episode of Sexploration with Monika we explore the visually-stimulating world of erotic dancing. We're on-location at the grand opening of the Penthouse Club and Steakhouse in San Francisco's North Beach. Do you want to know what these sexy performers get out of thier work (besides money)? What are the benefits of erotic dancing both for the dancer and the customer? Performers say it can be energizing, confidence-building, even healing, besides the obvious that it's fun and sexy! Nikita and Tatiana talk about what the customers get out of their experience (in addition to a stiff... drink). Torah talks about some of the people she meets, and how fun it is to dance for couples. Michelle and Nina talk about the workout that the 19-foot pole offers (that's 2 stories tall!) and how dancing helps them pay for college, their lives, and be independant. More super sexy photos of the event by Kevin Sam Photography. 
Direct download: Sexploration120315_Penthouse.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:26pm PDT

Purr with Me at the Second Base Party

You can join Sexploration with Monika at the "Second Base Party," a sexy party where instead of sex, you can go all the way to second base - which, for those of us who missed this in high school, 2nd base is above the waist. The theme is "Purr With Me" so there's plenty of heavy petting, purring, kitty cat ears and swishy tails. We speak with co-founders Jocelyn and Fuzzy Philippe of Club Exotica about how to create a party like this where everyone feels sexy, safe, frisky, and free. How can you create your own community like this? You can learn how to speak the language of the kitty cat to a potential lover, to help them communicate to you what they want and get permission for what you want. The unspoken communication of the kitty cat increases the vocabulary of your language of love by moving it out of the language of words to the language of touch, which is more subtle. Purr with Me is a party where you learn the behavior of sex parties, how to say yes. And how to say yes to what you want! What about the rules for playing? Could they make the game more interesting? 

Direct download: Sexploration120225_2ndBasePartyPurr.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:05pm PDT

Clean water can help heal the divide for the gay/religious communities?

What four letter benefit you receive by raising money and awareness for local AIDS organizations? How giving back backfires (in a good way). How you can spend less than a bathroom remodel, give an entire village the tools to build their own clean water infrastructure (and market those skills to surrounding villages), AND help heal the spiritual divide between the LGBT/Queer communities and religious organizations? Gay Night at the Wax Museum was a charity benefit for the Rainbow World Fund and the Richmond Ermit AIDS Foundation. We discuss the gay communities' aid projects for clean drinking water, health care, and HIV/AIDS outreach, plus, the humanitarian and spiritual implications of the gay communities' efforts to do good in areas traditionally relegated to religious orginizations. Jeff Cotter of the Rainbow World Fund shares how it can be healing for both the gay community and the religious organizations to collaborate on life-saving projects. Joe of the Richmond Ermit AIDS Foundation tells me what he got out of 18 years of raising money and awareness for local AIDS charities. Donna Sachet of "Sunday's a Drag" and the the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are glaming and glitzing up the wax museum too. Photo of Sister Pat 'N Leather and Sister Eve Volution in front of the wax Nazis by Joseph Driste of Smug Mug Photography.

Direct download: Sexploration120310_GayNightWaxMuse.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:12am PDT

Cum and Glitter, Science of Orgasm, and Sex-Worker Feminism

You can join me at the live sex show "Cum and Glitter" at a secret location in San Francisco. We'll listen to's Courtney Trouble giggle about how she has an orgasm through her hand! We'll also discuss mirror neurons, hairy girls, and how porn can make us treat each other better. How are the ebbs and flows of sexual energy and musical composition connected? Cellist Unwoman has a surprise. Whore Magazine's Ginger and the front row gets "baptized" (it's not what you think - or maybe it is:) and Kitty Stryker gets down with her babysitter, Bianca Stone, with some green saran wrap, pink hello kitty duct-tape, and "momma's toy." Guess what happens to the chocolate cupcakes piled high with swirls of pink frosting, and IS that glitter all over the stage? Ned Mayhem talks about the PSI-gasm project and how YOU can help. Maxine Holloway and Bianca Stone cap off the night, with body-image-conscious forced feminism and sparkly burlesque burka strip tease. Plus Ava Solanas and her cop fantasies, wow. What a night.

Direct download: Sexploration120225_CumNGlitter.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:21am PDT

Porn, Glitter, Consent, and Countering Sex-Negativity

Cum and Glitter star Ava Solanas will tell us about the future of live sex performance, the commingling of theatre, pornography, and performance art. Cum and Glitter is a live sex show by and for sex workers as part of an on-going empowerment-driven peer support project. Also a facilitator of sexy consent, negotiation, abuse survivorship, and self-defense workshops, Ava will tell us about how art, BDSM, sex work, and sex education intersect. Ava is a hairy porn star and we’ll discuss self-love, body-positivity, masturbation, and how she's made porn from her own point of view. We’ll get an update on current academic research the SF alternative porn scene, sex-positive culture, and the use of public platforms to counter sex-negativity from Ruchamah Van Der Horn of the Vrije University of Amsterdam. The reasons people work in porn and what they get out of it (besides money) might surprise you. Plus all the amazing sex-positive stuff coming up in San Francisco: the 8-Course Gourmet Dinner, the 2nd Base Party, the Fundraiser for Hollie Stevens the “Queen of Clown Porn,” and Gay Night at the Wax Museum at Fisherman’s Wharf on March 10th a benefit for the Richmond/Ermet AIDS Foundation and Rainbow World Fund. Thanks to our Token Straight Guy, Malcolm Grissolm from the Verve Show, for taking this photo of Monika in the studio before the show.

Direct download: Sexploration022412_PornGlitterConsent.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:00pm PDT

Removing the barriers to sexy: queer tantra and the natural birth control app

Tantra emphasises the sacred side of sexuality, but many tantra classes focus on the heterosexual couple, privileging feminine and masculine energy. Does human sexual energy really work within only the male/female binary? Evalena Rose teaches gay and all-women tantra, and believes we’re limiting ourselves by having to choose gay or straight. Evalena also tells us how critical it is for your relationship that you actually vocalize what you really want. Plus, are you sick of condoms and the pill? Does hormonal birth control make you feel crazy and out of whack? Check out Kindara, it is almost like the rhythm method 2.0 with an iPhone app and wireless thermometer. Except that during the course of the interview, creators Kati Bicknell and Will Sacks tell us why the rhythm method is practically doomed to failure, and Kindara's sympto-thermal method is 99.4% effective. Natural birth control in your pocket and your phone takes care of the math and complicated calendar? You can pinpoint and become more conscious of your fertility rather than trying to disrupt it, and get about 20 days a month of I'm-not-going-to-get-pregnant sex. Our Token Straight Guy this week is the hilariously irreverent Cory Sklar of Illogical Contraption, the Heavy Metal Coast to Coast on Whip-Its. How tantra removes the barriers to intimacy and the app that could help you safely use fewer condoms (and that doesn't mean because you are having less sex).

Direct download: Sexploration120217_SacredSexBirthControlApp.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:52pm PDT

Open the friendliest heart-shaped box of sex party in San Francisco!

Don’t you want to open the heart-shaped box of joyful ridiculousness that is San Francisco’s most friendly, vividly colorful (and yet somehow highly approachable) sex party? Founder Barron Scott Levkoff aka Professor Dandy will join us with the ins and out of throwing 10 years of Kinky Salon and the Sweetheart’s Ball this Saturday, February the 18th, 2012. Plus, I was surprised by a NEW sex acronym, CNFM! We’ll get comedian and Token Straight Guy Danny Dechi (of FCC Free Radio’s Radio Ha Ha Thursdays 4-6p in Studio 2B) to explain what CFNM is, and why he likes it. Plus, we’ll talk about Whore! magazine’s Love Court at the Casanova Lounge (Valencia and 16th) on Valentine’s Day, and directly after at 10pm supperclub’s My Saxy Valentine 70′s Soul party frolicking on the dance floor and supperclub’s infamous beds. Plus, we’ll check in with Dr. Bobby Love about the new Syncrohearts Love Game app for your iPhone or iPad available on iTunes for only 99 cents. We also take the most disturbing listener call of my whole radio career. I now actually think it’s for real, but do you think it's a joke?. We can only hope. Actually Professor Dandy's philosophy of getting your gentleman pervert on and rigorously pursuing social sexellence is a LOT less creepy - Self-proclaimed perverts less creepy than radio show callers? Only on Sexploration with Monika.    

Direct download: Sexploration021012_VDayFun.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:25pm PDT

Sexuality, GOD, and Being Queer: Waving Your Freak Flag @ the Divine

When religion tells you that the way you want to have sex is a sin, how does that affect your relationship with God and spirituality? What was your experience as a teenager, as change and desire surged through your body and you got messages that sex was only ok in the context of marriage? What if you can't get married because your desire falls outside of what the church thinks should be sanctified? For queer people whose sexualities are “controversial” and stigmatized in most churches, having your desire in direct contradiction to the messages of who you are supposed to be can really alienate you from God. There are many sexual expressions and identities that are pathologized by many religions. How could God be all-knowing, all-powerful, and good if what joy you feel in your body is evil? The God Project and Reviving Spirits are a project of Outlook Theater in San Francisco. The performance was taken directly from surveys about what people believe about God, gender, sexuality, pluralism, and atheism. You can take “the God Project” survey now. They want 1000 responses from all over the world, so please feel free to share the link. The goal of Outlook Theater is to bring the survey to life in various LGBTQ centers and places of worship using theater and dialogue to build bridges between the diverse LGBTQIA communities. Co-directors Anthony Julius Williams and Jason Wyman will discuss how spirituality and sexuality are connected, and how post-modern queer performance art is connected to damage around spirituality. Plus we’ll learn what personally drew Jason Wyman and Anthony Julius Williams to Reviving Spirits. What is the relationship to GOD for the queer, kinky, freaky, turned-on, and/or LGBTQIA community? What is GOD’s relationship to us?

Direct download: Sexploration020312_SexAndGod.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:08am PDT

Anal to academia - it doesn't have to hurt: misinformation in sex-ed.

Do you think anal sex is scary? Have you heard the prostate is the G-spot for men? Meet Good Vibrations’ sex educator Dr. Charlie Glickman and Aislinn Emirzian who are teaching a workshop on prostate play. We’ll be talking about fighting misinformation and sexual empowerment with Jessi Fischer, the sexademic. She’s Adjunct Professor at SFSU teaching their class on LGBTQ issues and society, and was recently invited to Cambridge University to speak in favor of pornography saying that the misogyny that overwhelms porn images is endemic in the greater culture (albeit perhaps more subtly than in porn), and porn can look like anything (depending on who makes it), not all of it is bad, plus it is a necessary catalyst for desire, experimentation, and debate about sexuality in our sexually repressed culture. While Fischer’s side won both debates on pornography, she discovered that speaking out in favor of porn excluded her from her true passion, teaching sex-neutral medically-accurate age-appropriate sex information for young people. Apparently even saying that porn could be a good thing when created ethically and used consciously by adults banned her from youth sex education. Now her work focuses on what she calls the real issues impacting sexuality: restrictive ideologies, sexism, anxiety, shame and willful misinformation. Also, San Francisco Sex Information’s fundraiser, "Burnlesque" at Public Works on Erie and Mission, with sexy performances by Mickey Finn and Dante DeMoan of the Rebel Kings, and The Electrodolls. We’ll find out if Professor Fischer will be manning the sex information booth. Our Token Straight Guy is The Rock & Roll Nurse from FCC Free Radio’s Backspins.

Direct download: 012012.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:17am PDT

Fight Sex-Negativity: SF Alt Porn and Amsterdam Academia

How can we help make sexuality more open and free? How do public platforms and sex-positive community work to normalize sexual freedom? Does porn have a role in creating sexual freedom? Ruchamah Van der Horn has come all the way from the University of Amsterdam to discuss the use of public platforms to counter social and cultural stigma of sex, with the sex-positive community and producers of alternative porn here in the San Francisco Bay Area. The United States may be ridiculed for it's closed mindedness and sex-negativity (sheah, as if abstinence-only works) but actually that works in favor of creating fertile and outspoken sex-worker activism and advocacy. And does empowerment go with less creepy porn and more sexy porn? Can they be the same thing? Yes and no, and as long as it makes you happy (and is consensual) as our cheerful porn stars point out. Alice in Bondageland’s Go Ask Alice talks about how the SF Alternative porn scene is about authenticity with queer porn star Arabelle Raphael who says porn can teach you who you really are. Yes, that's Arabelle Raphael of such adult XXX film hits as "Occupy My Ass" and "Asphyxia Heels the World" We're not joking, but you can laugh especially with Token Straight Guy comedian Malcolm Grissom!! See? Sexuality IS a social justice issue that can "heel" the world, that's what we can learn from alternative porn... and it's consensual.

Direct download: Sexploration012712_SexPositivePorn.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:44am PDT

As a sex-worker, what do you say when asked, "What do you do?"

When you're at a party, after you introduce yourself, what's the first thing people usually ask you? "What do you do?" When you're a sex-worker and you perform some kind or erotic service from dancing to sex for money, what do you say? Do you lie and tell them you're a life coach? Or do you tell them and deal with their slut-shaming judgement or sudden obtuse prurient interest (you're a sex worker so clearly you want to talk about or have sex all the time? Not.) What do if you are a sex-worker and your client falls in love with you? What do you do if you fall in love with a client? We'll talk to the dangerously smart pre-law Sandy Bottoms of the Lusty Lady (the only unionized and worker-operated peep show), and queer sex worker, size activist, and pleasure activist for people with disabilities, Kitty Stryker. We'll also explore SWOP (Sex Worker Outreach Project), discuss the difference between the male gaze and the female gaze in porn and strip clubs, and how to make space for a more aggressive female sexuality. Look out. With Token Straight Guy comedian Paul Brumbaugh of the Edge of Insanity.

Direct download: SandyBottomsKittyStryker.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:27pm PDT

You want life and love to be deep, sexy, pleasurable forever?
Do you want to have good sex for the rest of your life? So does Nancy, a self-described "pure sexual being," health educator, wellness coach, yoga therapist, wife, mother, grandmother, registered nurse, and creator of the Erotikos Film Festival at the notorious Hedonism Resort in Jamaica. We'll explore the difference between erotica and porn, ethical porn and unethical porn. Listen as Nancy takes us to the Hedonism Resort for a dip into sensuality, play, peak life experiences, and getting your mojo back. Token Straight Guy comedian Malcolm Grissom of the Verve Show would like to do some yoga to fit into Nancy's suitcase. Plus, in the “As You Desire” Sex and Relationship Blog, and her “Guide for Men to Unlock Your Woman's Sexual Desire,” Nancy wants to share secrets about juicy sacred sex for a lifetime and how to keep the spark of desire alive. Can pleasure have a higher purpose? Do you want connections that are both sexy and deep? For a lifetime? Which brings us to the work of Rabbi Ed Weinsberg Ed.D. The two most common cancers in men and women are prostate cancer and breast cancer and both affect our sense of our sexual self. However Rabbi Ed has been there and back, and his passion is helping anyone have great sex, pleasure, and intimacy after cancer. What really are your "sex organs" anyway, and is your definition limiting your pleasure? Can we expand our definitions and expand our ability to experience pleasure? 
Direct download: Deeper4everSexy.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:06am PDT

Feminism = better sex, 3somes, women who're not afraid to be sexy

How does feminism lead to better, more authentically open sex, pleasure-seeking and sharing, the possibility of threesomes, and women who are not afraid to be sexy? Join us for oysters & mimosas on Michelle’s sunny patio. We discuss why feminism leads to the ability to be more giving, juicier and more empowered relationships, and authentic sexual power. How moving away from women-competing-with-women can lead to better business, more fun, and in other situations... even threesomes with no drama! Plus sex-positive feminists Vanessa and Ginger on the joys, rewards, and “dangers” of flirting with feminists. Vanessa is San Francisco's sluttiest blogger Fleur De Lis SF and Ginger produces Whore! Magazine. How the message “sex should be fun” is actually quite serious and critically, crucially important in sex education. You can attend "Bang Bang Whore Speaks!," the release party for the 3rd issue of Whore! Magazine Thursday, January 19th 2012 at The Red Devil Lounge with reading, poetry, music and burlesque honoring female power, inclusion, creativity, and outspoken sexuality. What is more important to "sexy?" How sexy looks, or how sexy feels? 

Direct download: Sexploration011412_SexAndFeminism.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:39pm PDT

Sea of Dreams: why we celebrate midnight kissing strangers?

You can explore the glittering wunderworld of the Sea of Dreams New Year's Eve party in San Francisco as Sexploration with Monika goes on location. This is your ticket to a night of gold mirror-ball hoop dancers, klowns, a rainbow of costumed aerialists, the fantasy circus, a forest of fractals, time machines, and interactive music you can create, and a kaledescope of looking at the other self that is you. We'll speak with love tech-nicians, artists, sexy party scientists... asking what does it mean about our culture that everyone comes together to celebrate the end of every year? why is the clock ticking from 11:59 12/31 to 12:00 1/1 such a big deal that 7,000 costumed merry makers are cheering, hugging, kissing, and cuddling random strangers at the stroke of midnight? (Photo of Erin Shredder taken by Raymond Van Tassel.) In this longer Sea of Dreams podcast, we also connect with phantom captains, artists, and pleasurevolutionaries like Rich and Justin of Love Tech, Fuzzy Phillipe of Club Exotica, in-the-moment/graffiti-inspired artist Ian Ross, plus we'll speak with another Amrita Bollywood dancer the founder of the group, Julie Marquez, about "Amrita." The last time I heard the word "amrita" it was during the discussion of a rather black-belt kind of orgasm, so I had to talk to the dancers about how "amrita" had to do with bollywood dancing? Everyone is celebrating and coming together to party, but we all make up different reasons why it must be so important to celebrate New Year's Eve and kiss random people at midnight? 

Direct download: SeaOfDreams2012.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:14am PDT

A Taste of Amrita in the Sea of Dreams

You can join us in the glittering wunderworld Sea of Dreams as Sexploration with Monika goes on location. This is just a taste of the night with gold mirror-ball hoop dancers, klowns, a rainbow of costumed aerialists, the fantasy circus, a forest of fractals, time machines, and interactive music you can create, and a kaledescope of looking at the other self that is you. We'll speak now with Ileana of the Amrita Bollywood dancers. The last time I heard the word "amrita" it was during the discussion of a rather black-belt kind of orgasm, and I couldn't figure out how that had to do with bollywood dancing, so... (Photo of the Zenotope Collective taken by Raymond Van Tassel.) This is just to tease you for the longer Sea of Dreams podcast, (and this interview won't be in the longer Sea of Dreams episode), the longer episode is soon to come! 

Direct download: Amrita1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:45pm PDT